Tuesday, September 18, 2007

HERE ENDETH..................

This will be my last tale of woe on this blog. I'm leaving it open ...it may be of some help or even a warning to the those who are going through a similar situation....but I'll make no further posts after this. Even this is a struggle to write as it serves as a reminder of the less positive part of my life but in fairness to all those dear friends who wonder how things are going on in what can only be called the more "private" part of my life...here goes.
I had a short meeting with the CAB today. In their words "The feedback from my creditors has not been favourable". This has surprised them as they have had so many clients in the past whose income has been far higher than mine and whose debts have been far worse and have been successfully resolved. I guess it's sign of the times. I had gone to the CAB for help before I had accumulated any arrears at all but now 5 months down the line the situation is getting worse and worse..extra charges, constant phone calls and now the threat of debt collectors knocking at my door. I have one more appointmentment with the CAB next Friday (unfortunately the only one I can get and will mean missing a day at college) when I shall discuss the subject of Bankruptcy; barring that the only suggestion they can make is to see if some other agency can help......I can't go back to the beginning again....I don't have the strength.
I've finally relented and am taking anti-depressants prescribed by Doctor. I'd resisted this as to my mind no tablet will fill the void in my heart, increase my income or decrease my outgoings; but I really want to be positive about the college course I'm on and if in some way they will help me to focus on my studies and for a short while pop into another brain compartment my worries...well I guess it's worth a try.
Mick and I made so many good friends through this blog...and I know most of you also read Me, My Life, My Garden.....I hope you'll continue to join me there. My posts there MAY become less frequent as MAY my blogvisiting but I know you'll all understand how important this course is to me and that studying MUST come before Blogging.
“Remember today, for it is the beginning of always.
Today marks the start of a brave new future filled with all your dreams can hold.
Think truly to the future and make those dreams come true.”

15 visitors have commented:

CG said...

What a wonderfully inspiring quote to end on Ruth. Antidepressants helped me once - they are just a medicine for part of you that needs help,one day you won't need them anymore. I wish I could offer useful advice re the financial woes - but I wish you all the best with the college course and I'm cheering you on all the way.
Lots of love
J xxx

Akelamalu said...

Oh Ruth I wish I had a magic wand I could wave to make at least your money troubles go away. If the AD's help then of course you should take them. I'm keeping everything crossed for your next appointment with the CAB and your college course. x

Gillian @ Indigo Blue said...

I wish you health, happiness and peace of mind Ruth. If you need medical help in the meantime to acheive that, then so be it.
I like many others I am sure wish I were in a position to help you. Keep studying, and hang on the parts of your life that keep you going right now.
Sending love and thoughts of you,
Gillian
(I will visit you on your other blog.)

Mousie/Paisible said...

it's time for you to concentrate on yourself...don't worry for us...we know we're still friends, we know you don't forget us...but it's important Ruth...hold on darling, we are on your side...don't worry if you don't have much time to post or visit blogs...you have a challenge to win, and you'll win, I know you will...i agree with cq, don't refuse tablets, it may help and ease stress...we love you ruth

Gene Bach said...

Hang in there Ruth. Blog about your studies...that might even help you along. Don't give up!

Audrey said...

Sending you a big hug Ruth..You will get through this, even as I wrote that it sounds so trite, but I know you will..If I could change anything from my past it would be that I had learned sooner not to have let my debts be like the be all, end all...I wish you all the right people to help and support you through this particular journey.

I too have benefitted from antidepressants and would never struggle again if I felt the need for them in the future.

You really are an inspiration Ruth and you deserve the best. Enjoy your studies and your time at college its important that you have something just for you xxx Auds

Jenny said...

I had great help from antidepressants at a low point in my life - they gave me the strength to move myself forward. I hope this college course makes the difference for you and I'll be thinking of you even if you don't update this blog!

RUTH said...

Thanks so much for your comments; I really felt "bad" about accepting the antidepressants...I felt I was being a failure by taking them. Whether they will help or not I don't know but it's encouraging to get this positive feedback.
{{HUGS}}
Rx

karoline said...

{{{ruth}}}

“It takes more courage to reveal insecurities than to hide them, more strength to relate to people than to dominate them, more 'manhood' to abide by thought-out principles rather than blind reflex. Toughness is in the soul and spirit, not in muscles and an immature mind.”Alex Karras

k:)

Auntie Noo said...

"here endeth.......today's lesson" ....... That each day is a adventure, which is special for what it is, not necessarily good - but always special. That each days teaches us something, about ourselves or others. That each day is a journey - sometimes to be skipped along and sometimes to be endured. That each day brings us different challenges - some we rise to and some we fail at - we're human......! That each day someone will make us smile...... maybe just a little tiny one, but it will be there..... always. That each day a friend somewhere will be thinking of us, for maybe just a split second.... but somewhere in our hearts we know and feel momentarily lighter for it.

I'll definitely be seeing you over on the gardening blog, but just wanted to thank you for sharing this one with us. Good luck with the college! and everything else.

Sheila said...

I only just found this post Ruth, I had been visiting your other page. As for anti- depressants...well I know first hand, with out them I would not be here writing this now. I was unable to function except on auto pilot, and that is not living.
If I have to take them for the rest of my life ( probably not!) I will, I don't ever want to go back to that dark place.
Difficult as it may seem at the moment, focus on your studies, and take care of yourself. You have done the responsible thing regarding your debt, let the universe take care of the rest.
Love and hugs
See you on your other blog...
xxx

Gledwood said...

As for those bastard creditors - give 'em a slap with a wet fish. What yukky people!
If bailiffs ever DARE to come by, you must photo and film them. Get written letters stating the camcorder/camera/computer etc belong to other people and are yours only on loan haha!
That is a wonderful quote, it shows whatever mess you have made in the past you can give yourself a clean slate (even if others will not afford you that privilege!)
Farewell Ruth's Million Stories...
please do not delete it! You don't need to and as you say it might help someone...
I'm here as I have withdrawals from your computer being in A&E...

Sylvia said...

Ruth - Wanted to say I am sorry you won't be blogging and sorry that I lost touch. In case this sends and email to you, please let me know hwo you are now.

Wanted to stop by and say hello. I have been missing in action due to personal issues in my life. I neglected the friends I met through my blogs and that I regret and apologize to each of you. The personal issues caused me to sink into depression and anxiety and withdraw from life for a while. I have begun the process of resolving those issues and getting back to life. I will be visiting and catching up with what is going on in your lives.

Easybreathingfella said...

Ruth,
Just came across your sight, you have the talent to write about your most personal thoughts and concerns.
Something very few can do, "hugh tip" write a blog about the happiest time of your life, it will lift the gloom and allow you to focus on the good side of life.
Tell me if the above works and I'll give you some tip's on Financial matters thats what I did for a living till I too became a terminal case (see my early blogs).
Till then SODEMTILLTOMMOROW.

Hapi said...

hello... hapi blogging... have a nice day! just visiting here....