I'm not happy with this blog anymore; when Mick was alive even when we were having bad days I would blog and before I knew it the gloom would turn to sunshine. Lately this hasn't been happening...I don't know if it can again. I don't want to close it completely; it acts as a memorandum during my battle with the Benefits Agencies and assorted creditors....who I rang, when I rang, what I/they said etc. But I don't want it to turn into the pathetic ramblings of a miserable woman and I know I'm getting lower and lower each day.....Hopefully at some point I'll turn the corner. At the moment I'm seeking the proverbial "light at the end of the tunnel"; trying desperately to actually look forward to something........I'm searching in my own Pandora's Box...trying to find HOPE but at the moment it's alluding me. I know I can still laugh...I've read quite a few blogpals posts lately that have made me laugh out loud...but the laughter soon fades...snuffed out by the sorrow within me.
I've been doing daily posts for a long time now; each day with Mick was precious..............I'm posting today about my calls to B.D.C. and the benefits office and I'll probably post about the CAB appointment on Thursday.....but there will be days in between...days like yesterday when I've been gardening, walking, reading, taking photographs....these are days that belong on my M.M.L.M.G. blog....all that would be left for this blog is the emotional turmoil I'm going through....no fun to read and no fun to write. So from now on my regular posts will be on my "garden" blog and I'll just stick to "business" here..............
Well that's the theory...only time will tell if it works in practice.
Right now to the phone calls; by some miracle it only took 15 minutes to speak to Babergh District Council about the Rent and Council Tax I've been told I have to pay...the lady I spoke to was very nice, she is deferring the decision for now....once/IF I do get the £87p.w. Bereavement Allowance I'll have to make the payments up but at least for now they won't be attempting to take Direct Debits out of my bank account...which would result in non-payment due to insufficient funds AND a hefty great bank charge because payment was refused!
The Bereavement Allowance Office wasn't a lot of help...they agree that my Carer's Allowance has now ceased but my paperwork is with the "DECISION MAKER'S" and so they are unable to tell me WHEN or IF I will receive any money. They did say I should get a decision SOON but were unable to define exactly when SOON would be.
I'm still unable to get any further re the £109 in Mick's bank account....the Bank has a "back-log" it seems and so as yet are unable to help re: WHEN/IF/HOW I can gain access to that.
I've filled the form in that I received from one of Mick's Credit Card Companies...there is a long list of things they need to know re: ASSETS...stocks and shares, motor vehicle, property and the such like..the only thing that was relevant was that £109 in his bank account..........that was rather outweighed by the figure I had to put in the LIABILITIES column...which included Funeral Expenses.
To end this post on a bright note...
Jenny finished her Triathlon on Saturday... I was so pleased for her. This week is going to be an energetic week for another couple of blogpals too.....
Julie (CG) who is a regular commenter/supporter on my blogs is doing her Race For Life on Wednesday evening (can't believe they do an
evening run in Chester...that's when I'd be wanting to put my feet up!) and
AuntieNoo is doing hers on Saturday...bet they're glad I won't be there videoing there "warm-ups" like I did with
Kim!
I saw this on
Claire's Blog and just had to have one myself......please feel free to share it.....