Wednesday, January 10, 2007


What a fabulous morning it has been. Mick woke up and seemed very alert; it was not my imagination as Manda commented on it when she popped in on her way to work. Mick drank all his tea and ate all his porridge; first time for quite a while. As I was so thrilled I started singing one of his little ditties to him, "Your a Star, Your a Star.." and MICK SANG "GREAT BIG TITS AND A SEE THROUGH BRA"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I honestly thought I was dreaming; I literally pinched myself as I choked back my tears of happiness. The last time this happened was back in November last year....and strangely enough it was when I sang exactly the same song! I have been "all over the place" since then; I really don't know if I'm "coming or going" such is the state of euphoria I am in. I did somehow manage to text the girls and tell them the exciting news...they are so THRILLED. Although I'm always happy to hear Mick say ANYTHING the fact that he SANG and sang something FUNNY makes it all the more special because it tells me that HE IS HAPPY!!!!!

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Now on a more serious note; I always try and keep away from the subjects of religion, politics and general world news on my posts unless it specifically pertains to our situation; today, however, I'm going to break that rule and share with you a story that is in the news in England at the moment.

Dying woman begged for food, inquest told· NHS staff dispute claim 91-year-old was starved· Inquest hears she was not fed for 4 days in hospital

Lee Glendinning

Tuesday January 9, 2007 The Guardian

A 91-year-old grandmother left in hospital for four days without food or fluids had begged to be given a beetroot sandwich, some macaroni cheese and a cup of tea shortly before she died, an inquest heard yesterday.
The family of Olive Nockels, a former school matron from Holt, Norfolk, say she had asked them if she could have something to eat and drink, although this is disputed by doctors and nurses at the Norfolk and Norwich University hospital.
Mrs Nockels had been receiving fluids containing dextrose after being admitted to the hospital on September 14 2003 following a stroke, the inquest in Norwich heard. But doctors decided to stop when she developed an oedema - a build-up of excess fluid in her body - and became "waterlogged", leaking fluid from her arms, trunk and legs.
Two attempts were made to fit Mrs Nockels with a tube to feed her through her nose , but she became distressed and the efforts were abandoned.
Between October 2 and October 6, 2003, she went without any food or fluids, the inquest heard.
Her grandson, Chris West, obtained a high court injunction ordering the treatment to be reinstated, but it was overturned the next day when a hospital consultant expressed concern to the judge.
In a statement to the court, Mr West said: "It was around this time that they said my grandmother's quality of life was so poor, that they shouldn't intervene, and [should] let her die. They said there was nothing they could do for her.
"I was not willing to accept that. You do not let someone die just because [you] think it's best for them."
Mrs Nockels died four days after the high court ruling on October 10.
Mr West said that he had a conversation with a doctor in which he said: "How my grandmother is being treated - not getting any fluids or food - I would not treat my dog like that." The doctor allegedly replied: "Vets have got more power than doctors." The doctor has denied this.
A consultant geriatrician, Brian Payne, hd examined Mrs Nockels. He told the inquest that he was not aware of her having asked for food. She seemed confused when he asked simple questions, and when he broached the possibility of a feeding tube, she did not respond - apart from telling him to go away. "When I asked her whether she realised she would die, or whether she wished to die, or was ready to die, she made no response," he said. "I felt I was looking at a 91-year-old lady who was exceptionally frail with multiple disabilities, and I thought she was dying."
In a statement previously handed to the coroner, Mrs Nockels' daughter, Ivy West, said that when the hospital stopped feeding her mother through tubes, her mother had made an impassioned plea. "She said 'Help, help me, help me please.' They weren't feeding her or giving her any drink. I think she knew what was going on." The inquest continues

Now I know this poor lady was bound to die. I am in a similar situation with Mick. He has terminal brain cancer with no possibility of recovery....I have no choice but to accept that fact. He may well meantime contract pneumonia or some other illness in the meantime and die..................I have no choice but to accept that fact. However, as long as I have breath in my body he WILL NOT DIE OF STARVATION OR DEHYDRATION! My heart goes out to the family of Mrs Nockels' and I hope they can find some peace. In this day and age no one should have to die in pain and suffering and I fully support anyone's "RIGHT TO DIE"; but they die in PEACE AND CONTENTMENT. It makes me wonder whether this attitude of the NHS is why it took 6 months for anyone to tell me about "Thick and Easy" and a further 3 months before I was told that the Hyoscine Patches existed when Mick was having so much trouble swallowing.

That said I shall now go and put back on my all singing, all dancing hat and enjoy the rest of this very special and memorable day.

7 visitors have commented:

Analia said...

Oh my dear Ruth, sing, sing loud for you have a good reason to do it, someone we all love is enjoying it. I'm very happy both of you are having such a nice morning and I want to sing too!!

I've read the other part of the story and I know you will do what it takes to bring comfort to Mick till the moment comes... and though that is something I, and I guess many of us, have to learn to accept, we will be here to support you everyday of your journey as well. You for Mick, we for both of you :)

But now my friend I join to the chorus and sing with you because you made me extremely happy today!!

gledwood said...

I never knew you had 3 blogs... how slow of me... and I wondered why you kept putting ... I thought this was your old one (for some reason) ... I love the melancholy music btw, who is it?

crpitt said...

I love the first bit of the post! It made me smile!

Secong part of post made me, Sad, Angry and god knows what else!
Many a time mum has been intensive care and i have looked down at her, surrounded by machines, thinking do you want this?
Of course she did, thank god!
I wish i could go on google and find a cure for mick, but i cant and its an ARSE! of a thing.
There will be a time for me to think and act the way you are now with Mick(which is awesome!) and i hope i can be like you.
In the mean time days like today mean Mick isn't ready to go anywhere!

Ruby in Bury said...

Mick has a fab sense of humour!!

The story about the lady left to die is both tragic and scarey - it makes you wonder how often that sort of thing happens. Many people in that situation have no one to speak up out on their behalf.

RUTH said...

Thanks for all the comments; nice to have Ruby back; Claire hopefully things will stay steady for you for a long time yet esp with all that homework you have to do!; Analia you always bring some of that lovely warm sunshine with you when you visit; GW the current song on this blog is by the Who...I change them every now and then as the fancy takes me. I didn't realise you thought I only had the one blog; nice to have you visit.

Audrey said...


How wonderful to be reading what you wrote about Mick. I should imagine your heart swelled up and rose so far at that moment. How precious :)

The thing I cant understand about situations like the lady spoken of here is that despite anything there is a duty to care and health proffesionals at any level are bound by that...this is shocking......water,food suppliments cost nothing there is no excuse, ever no explanation can justify this lack.

Wishing you many more of those all singing all dancing days x

RUTH said...

Having read back over his post I must make something clear....natuarally if Mick was in a coma, did not want food or was physically unable to take food I would not be trying to force feed him! At the moment although he sometimes has difficulty (not as much now since the patches) with eating and drinking HE WANTS TOO. Often I can give him something and can tell he is not enjoying it yet he will happily eat something different i.e. didn't want the soup but will eat two yoghurts. If I am giving him any medicine I can say "do you wants to lick the spoon" and he will. At the present time (who knows what tomorrow will bring) he still has the WILL and NEED to eat and drink and I shall do my best to fulfil that wish.